So it is, as of two minutes ago, Holy Saturday. I'm right at the tail end of Holy Week, with just an Easter service between me and the end of one of the most exhausting seasons of church life. I wanted to get in a blog post but just couldn't bring myself to think theologically about anything else right now, so instead, I am going to focus on what it would be like to be the pastor to Super Heroes.
Because those questions need ANSWERING, darn it.
I am currently not watching the second season of Daredevil because I will be seeing my family after Easter and they wanted us all to start it together for... reasons, I suppose. I adored Daredevil, as I have stated previously on this very blog, but one of things I really loved about it was the Priest that Murdoch confided in.
So here's the thing about pastors in media. If we aren't evil, then we're either magic or incompetent. Do we know the sacred words from some ancient text to drive out the menacing evil? Or do we just hang around as walking anachronisms, not understanding (and not really expected to understand) anything about the world around us? Those often seem to be our options.
The Priest in Daredevil (Father Lantom) is none of those things. He doesn't have magical solutions for Murdoch, neither does he just sit there unaware of who Murdoch is. Instead, he cares, he listens, he advises as he is able and tells the truth. He basically is everything I would want to be as a Pastor if I discovered I had a Superhero in my congregation.
But that, of course, got me thinking of what I would do for various Superheroes in my congregation, and what I thought my own personal consequences would be as a minor player in a comic story. So here we go:
Captain America: No secret identity at play here, I would have Steve Rogers come into my church with me knowing completely who he is and wondering how to help. I think I would be partially overwhelmed by him... how do you help someone like him who is lost in time? To help out, I think I would largely just be an ear to hear his stories and encourage him to take part in different social events, primarily to help him make friends and colleagues. When he was ready, we would talk about grief.
Cap himself is rarely a direct target of nefarious schemes, so I doubt I would get personally drawn into his stories, unless I made enough of a stink when SHIELD declared him a Fugitive in Winter Soldier.
Iron Man: I am having trouble seriously imagining Tony Stark attending church, but maybe Jarvis/Vision would point him my way after reading this blog, or he loses a bet with Steve. In any case, I would resist the urge to preach primarily on tithing and talk to Tony about guilt, when it helps, and when it needs to be let go.
I doubt I would survive my time as a Iron Man spin-off. Talking with him about evading guilt, my church would inevitably be attacked by a Power Armored Super Villain looking to take Tony down, and I would get killed protecting him while hijinks ensued around him getting into his armor. Luckily for my family, it's a fair bet Stark puts my child through college after that, so I'll call it a win.
Thor: Man, how complex would that be? I'd probably have some long conversations with him about what he was aware of going on in Palestine for huge chunks of history, but if he came to me for counseling, I suspect it would be in the form of wanting help with his relationship with Jane Foster, and what love means between two people with lives so complexly varied. I'd get to tell him to use his words, and to remember that no time is promised, and so to enjoy the time he has.
A Prince of Asgard in a Midgardian house of worship, and NOT a House of Worship for an Asgardian? THAT would come up, and I would probably end up captured and tortured by some offended Asgardian official influenced by Loki until Thor showed up explain/save me. But hey, probably a trip through the Bifrost, right? That would be cool. Maybe I'd chat with Heimdal afterwards if I survived. (If we were REALLY lucky, it would involve someone in full Asgardian Armor asking me Where My God Was Now, waiting for his challenge to be accepted.)
Nightcrawler/Any of the X-men: Likely approached initially for my equality stances, my church would welcome Mutants and I would have fascinating conversations with Nightcrawler as he further explored his faith through Biblical imagery, while constantly reminding him that the Image of God is not a visual thing, but a spiritual one.
I probably go down by a bullet from a mutant hater in this scenario (or maybe Wade Wilson because why not) but maybe I would eventually be revealed to be a low-level mutant myself, with my struggle not being welcoming the mutants who come to my church, but welcoming the humans, until Kurt finally convinces me to "come out."
Spiderman: I can imagine a teen-aged Peter Parker in my Youth Group or confirmation class, realize what he is doing and working with him as he struggles with concepts of responsibility, all the way up to the point where I die for being a trusted figure who isn't Aunt May. If this seems short, it's because it wouldn't take all that long.
Got any other heroes you want me to run the evaluation on? Toss me a question or comment, and I'll do another one of these after I've watched the second season of Daredevil!
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